Weevil Hunting
by luckypixi
Summary: The team go on a Weevil hunt. A bit of fun. Slight Ianto bashing.


'Jack this is pointless, we're never gonna find it' Owen grumbled. They had been walking around a patch of deserted wasteland for over an hour now, looking for an escaped Weevil. They normally didn't shoot to kill, but this one was different; it had absorbed some rift energy and was the Weevil equivalent of a hyperactive child eating three bags of candy floss.

'Stop moaning Owen' giggled Gwen. She splashed in a shallow puddle, spraying the two men with mud.

'If you do that again' warned Owen, 'I'm going to-'

'Shut up!' whispered Jack. There was a loud splash behind them. They all spun round to see the gigantic form of the Weevil silhouetted in the moonlight. The Weevil sniffed and then uncharacteristically ran off.

Gwen looked at Jack. 'And it ran, why?'

Jack shrugged. 'Maybe it looked at Owen and decided not to bother' he grinned.

'Cheers Jack'

Together they sullenly walked in the direction the Weevil had run to. Jack touched his ear comms.

'Ianto, my main man. Please tell me you know where it's gone'

Gwen smiled at Ianto's reply; 'How the bloody hell would i know where it's gone!? You lot just dumped me, on my own and ran off. Tosh has been going crazy, checking up on me every-' He paused and Owen guessed he was checking his watch. 'Three minutes. And what do you mean "Where it's gone"? How could you lose it?!'

'Calm down Ianto!' Jack managed to intercept Ianto's rambling. 'Look, we just need a trace. Where are you? We could meet up.'

'I have absolutely no bloody idea where i am Jack, no more than i know how far Neptune is from Venus.'

'Well, nor do i, so we should look that up when we get back' Owen turned and smirked at Jack.

'Fun' Grumbled Ianto. Gwen giggled. Jack shot a mock frown at her.

'Well', continued Ianto. 'There is a big building next to me and a big path. I'm walking down it now'

'Keep us posted Ianto' Jack turned off his comms.

'What now?' asked Owen.

Jack shrugged. 'Just keep walking i guess'

Ianto trudged down the muddy, pebbly path, which was adjacent to the big farmhouse on his right.

He was glad he had changed his shoes; he didn't mind getting his trainers muddy. Better than his suit shoes. It was a cool night and he pulled his thin coat around him. A bird squawked above him. Suddenly there was a huge crash in the bush on his left and he flung himself backwards as the Weevil bounded onto the path. It sniffed around and spotted Ianto. Ianto started to back off slowly. The Weevil came closer, still sniffing the air. Ianto held his breath, still backing off. Suddenly another bird squawked and the Weevil was startled. It ran off, back down the path.

Ianto was mystified; he had never seen a Weevil act like that before. He touched his comms, but the rest of the team had turned theirs off. Great, thought Ianto as he continued trudging up the path, on my own _again_. He walked up the path, following the Weevil.

The path broadened out, leading to a large clearing. There was a large, very muddy pond to his left and some more bushes to his right. He walked into the middle of the clearing. Just ahead of him he noticed the rest of the team. They were looking the other way than him; they hadn't seen him. He started to run to them, but the Weevil was faster. It crashed out of the undergrowth, running straight at Jack, Owen and Gwen.

'Guys!' he called. They turned, now seeing the Weevil. Ianto heard Gwen scream in shock. He had to do something.

'Hey you!' he shouted at the Weevil. 'Yeah you!' he picked up a rock from the ground and hurled it at the Weevil. It hit it on the head and it turned, now running full pelt towards Ianto.

_Now what genius?_ Ianto ran to his left, dodging out of the way as the Weevil swiped at him.

'Ianto!' he heard Jack shout. He was about to shout back when the Weevil's viciously sharp claw hit him on the chest, ripping his shirt. He grabbed at the Weevil, which was now on top of him, trying to shove it off. It pushed it's ugly face into Ianto's and he blanched as it's rancid breath forced itself up his nostrils. He heard a shot, but it didn't make any difference. The Weevil pushed harder and Ianto tripped, falling backwards into the dark, dank water. Luckily it wasn't very deep, just covering his lap. He heard more shots at the team shot at the Weevil. Finally after what must have been 20 or more shots the Weevil started to weaken. It relented its grip on Ianto's shoulder. He heard more shots. Suddenly there was a searing pain in his leg and he heard Owen shout 'Shit!' The Weevil, finally defeated fell backwards into the water. When all the spray subsided Jack could get a clearer picture of the scene. There in the swirling water was a dead Weevil and Ianto clutching his leg.

'Who shot me!?' he shouted at them.

Owen raised a tentative hand. Ianto splashed him.

'Thanks a lot. What would you have done if you shot me in the head instead of the leg?'

'Buried you i suppose.'

Ianto shook his head and heaved himself out of the water. Jack ran forwards to help him. He dragged Ianto up the bank and helped him limp to a rock on which he could sit. Owen bent down to look at his leg, while Gwen inspected his chest wounds. 'Now i'm Mr. Popular' grinned Ianto to Jack. Jack laughed, patting his shoulder. Then he bent down, looking worriedly at his wounds.

Gwen touched the gashes on his chest and Ianto gasped 'God that stings' he whispered.

'Sorry' said Gwen.

'Well, Dr Harper. What's the diagnosis?' Jack asked.

'I'm sorry it's bad news. Are you his next of kin?'

'I'm the only family he needs'

Gwen punched Owen gently on the shoulder.

'Well, Mr. Jones, it seems that the idiot who shot you just managed to skim the skin. That sounds weird doesn't it; skim the skin? Anyway' he continued after receiving a glare from Gwen 'Just a coupled of stitches, some painkillers and maybe some crutches i'm afraid.' He grinned at Ianto straightening up. Ianto got up. He tried to put weight on his leg. He managed two and a half paces before his leg gave way; he ended up sprawled on the floor. 'Thanks for helping me up guys' he said, dragging himself back over to the rock. He looked over to Jack, who had gone over to inspect the Weevil. 'Can we go now?' he called. 'It's freezing out here'

Jack turned and grinned. 'Come on then Ianto Jones, lets get you home.' He walked over to Ianto, grabbing his hand and hauling him up. Ianto groaned as he put weight again on his leg.

'This will never do' commented Jack. Ignoring Ianto's cry's of protest he bent down, grabbed the Welshman around the knees picking him up in a firemans lift.

'Jack, put me down!'

'Come on team' shouted Jack, ignoring Ianto. 'Forward march'

And he marched off, with Ianto slung over his shoulder, kicking his legs and swearing in welsh.

Owen and Gwen grinned at each other and followed on.


End file.
